Minion Mondays 2: It’s not just Mondays

One would think it’s just about Mondays but not really. It’s about not having the option to sit around in your pyjamas, bundled into your couch with a cup of tea. And a nice book in your hand or an awesome show on television.

Source : Facebook page ‘Minion Quotes’

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Don’t get me wrong, I like what I do for a living. But I cannot deny that it would be SO much more fun if it were optional to work, but the money just came in because you know, someone needs to pay those bills. Or if you could send a substitute if you don’t feel up to it. Like cricketers.

Poor Monday has acquired this bad repute for giving people ‘blues’. My blues are a bit like this:

Monday: too far from Saturday

Tuesday: still too far from Saturday

Wednesday: getting closer, not so bad. Especially after lunch, you’re over the hill after lunch.

Thursday: like it! One day to go!

Friday: Too close to Saturday without really being Saturday. But wooohoooooooo no alarm tonight!

Saturday: the best day ever!

Sunday: Early onset of Monday blues

So it’s not Monday that I have a problem with. It’s rules and expectations in general. And this whole grown up thing involving jobs and norms.

Sitting around doing nothing is my favourite type of day :).

Which is why my favourite animal is a cow. For its sheer inertness to anything around it. Anyone who has ever travelled on Indian roads would know exactly what I mean! So I’m a cow sitting in the middle of a busy road. You’re a guy in a big car? Ok you’re honking, why exactly? You want me to move? Nice try bud. You’re the one who wants to pass through, you’ll find a way I’m sure. I’m not going anywhere. See I’m busy chewing something I gulped yesterday.

***comfort zones are too comfortable to come out of***

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Patterns and trends

I find patterns for a living, my job involves analysing past data and understanding the drivers of recent trends, and using this information to predict what might happen in the future. I have realised that before you know it, you start finding patterns in the smallest things in life. Now don’t judge me as I give you some examples.

  • I have a mental record of the lifetime of my pots and pans and I compare trends over time. I also do a price vs lifespan comparison. For some reason I remember the price of most things I’ve bought, so it makes the ratio calculation easier. My conclusion from this is that a certain prestigious Indian brand produces poor quality ceramic coated pans.
  • I once used my free time on train platforms in the UK to assess how late a train needs to be for authorities to apologise. 3 minutes. 
  • Not too long ago, I was using a terrible mobile network. I started using Google’s connectivity statistics to monitor coverage by geographical area. So I then tuned my connectivity expectations in line with my research findings. I would get frustrated only if my network was poor in an area where I’m supposed to have good connectivity..
  • My friends and I try to make our own control lines around the weather predictions on the BBC website. The main aim here is to resist wearing a jacket in summers. “It’s not about the temperature, check the range of the wind speed instead” or “If it says ‘showers’ or ‘light rain’ I can handle it without an umbrella.”

It’s a useful habit I suppose, helps me stay weather protected, buy pans wisely, change my travel routes such that I can use my phone etc. But it still doesn’t tell me anything about the useless pattern finding, like when would they apologise (in advance!) for a train that’s expected to run late.

This urge to find patterns may lead me to conclude that I’m in the right job, maybe it’s good that a person like me spends their day understanding trends and making conclusions. But sometimes I wonder if it’s the other way around. Have I become so used to finding order in the chaos, finding a method to the madness that I have forgotten what it’s like to let the little things in life be random and unexplained? 

I didn’t always check whether it’s supposed to rain, definitely not as a child. If it rained, we gleefully got drenched, made paper boats, jumped in puddles, gorged on steaming samosas, and came back home to annoyed parents!

So why is it that we now feel the need to be able to plan, understand, forecast and explain everything? It’s probably part of this whole ‘being a grown up’ package. Oh well, there you go, there’s another explanation.